| Ladies and gentlemen of the class of
'97: Wear
sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip
for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term
benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists,
whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this
advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of
your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the
power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But
trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of
yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much
possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really
looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future. Or
worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying
to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The
real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blind side
you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that
scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other
people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are
reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on
jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're
behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with
yourself.
Remember compliments you receive.
Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me
how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw
away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't
know what you want to do with your life. The most
interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most
interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to
your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you
won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe
you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you
do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate
yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are
everybody else's.
Enjoy your body. Use it every way
you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people
think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever
own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere
to do it but your living room.
Read the directions, even if you
don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines.
They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents. You
never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your
siblings. They're your best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and
go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard
to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because
the older you get, the more you need the people who knew
you when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but
leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once,
but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable
truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander.
You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize
that when you were young, prices were reasonable,
politicians were noble, and children respected their
elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to
support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll
have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one
might run out.
Don't mess too much with your
hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy,
but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form
of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past
from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly
parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
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